A LETTER TO MY YOUNGER SELF: A VULNERABILITY ASSIGNMENT

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I was given the assignment to offer up insight to my younger self while sitting in a rocking chair, after having experienced a full life.  I didn’t know what to expect in the letter I was going to write but somehow, the words simply flowed…

I am sitting in my rocking chair, on the stoop of my deck overlooking the calm ocean. I recognize the feeling of groundedness. Connectedness. I absorb all of my surroundings in the present moment with all senses. I breathe in the salty ocean air and feel its essence fill my nose and lungs. I hear the soft waves crash, over and over, intertwined with the cawing of birds dancing above. I watch as the near-full moon waxes, rises, and beams, and takes over the fading sky. I taste the ever-so-slight sweetness of increasingly cool tea on my lips. I feel the lukewarm breeze dusting my face. It is my favourite place to be and I know better than to take it for granted.

At this point in my life, I truly understand what it feels like to be satisfied with very little. To be passionate, to surround yourself with love of all kinds, to be healthy, playful and full of youth, no matter the age; these intangible “things” are what matter most. I am happy to have been open to get to know myself, to love myself, delve deep and explore myself. To get to know the light that shines and also the darkness that looms. I am happy to see myself in others, both positive and negative, and to learn from them. Turns out, closed doors are not for this woman. No. Vulnerability is a teacher and it hasn’t been comfortable but it sure as hell has not been considered a weakness.

I am proud that I had the courage to wholeheartedly pursue my dreams. I pushed passed the fear, self-doubt, and negative talk and came out thriving on the other side. Not only do I feel rich in love but in life, too. I am proud that throughout this process, I was able to let others help me and let go of the idea I could do everything on my own. I am also proud that I took the time to create a healthy environment in which my body could thrive. I share this notion with all that I meet.

Looking back, there are certain lessons I would share to my current self. I would tell her that it’s important to let others in and let them help her along her journey of this life. I would tell her to be open to developing and exploring the kind of love a male figure can provide which would allow her to do whatever it takes to finally meet her father for the first time; it’s scary but she deserves it. Lastly, I would tell her to let go of the inherent need to constantly be perfect because life doesn’t come wrapped in a lovely box tied neatly with a bow. Quite opposite, actually, it’s fucking messy and that’s OK.

I challenge you to try this for yourself, whether that means writing your answers or merely taking a moment to think about them. What wisdom, knowledge, and/or insight would you share with yourself? Let your intuition guide you and don’t be afraid to acknowledge those immediate but often overlooked thoughts that spark, they make up our subconscious mind and are a part of who we truly are.

After all, we know what’s best for ourselves. Whether or not we listen is a different story.

2 comments


  • Wendy

    This is beautiful. Thank you so much. Focusing on gratitude, connection to others, and above all else, love, is completely transforming. Your open heart is a wonderful thing for you to share with us. You are a great teacher.

    June 30, 2015
    • Jamie Lee

      Thank you for your kind words, Wendy! I experienced a little resistance before I shared this post but I’m happy I did.

      July 03, 2015

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